If you have ever watched Friends then you probably know where I’m going with this. If not, let me explain. In a simple sense a “lobster” is the person that you are meant to fall in love with and be with forever.
My birthday is in a month and it just hit me that by then, I’ll have gone two whole decades without a “lobster”. I feel like I am missing out on something, everyone I know is either in a relationship (that they’ve probably been in for over 3 years) or they are in the beginning stages with someone that they are probably going to end up in a relationship with. Love is supposed to be this great and powerful thing that is so unique and beautiful to anything any human has ever experienced…so why haven’t I experienced it?
This question can drive you mad if you think about it long enough, you start picking apart every little piece, examining every cell of yourself, trying to figure out why God hasn’t sent you someone yet. If you’ve been in my shoes then I am sure you have also been told things like “It happens when you least expect it” or “When the time is right you’ll meet someone”. I don’t know about y’all but I am tired of waiting, tired of tricking myself into “not expecting it”, and tired of unanswered prayers. But, through all this “tiredness” and frustration, I realized two things:
First, is that God truly is going to send you someone when the time is right, but we don’t know when that time is, which is frustrating, I know. I’ve noticed in the past few weeks, though, that there are things in my life that need to grow and improve before I can be in a relationship with someone. Don’t get me wrong I absolutely still pray that I meet somebody, and I will continue to do so probably until I am physically walking down the aisle, but now when I pray, instead of putting all my hope behind it, I put my faith behind it. Faith that everything truly will unfold itself in due time, and that when the time is truly right, even if it’s another two decades from now (but I seriously hope it’s not), I will find my “lobster”, and I will finally get to experience this love that everyone seems to have.
Secondly, is that I have been looking at love all wrong. The main thing I’ve been chasing is feeling someone else’s love, but I’ve only been looking at it from a romantic perspective. If I shift a little bit, I can see that love actually is all around me. It’s my family, my hobbies, God, and most significantly my friends. Remember when I said I was tired of unanswered prayers? Well, after some reflection I realized that’s not true, and that God really does have a sense of humor, but that he also knows what we need and when we need it. When I prayed for someone who would lead me closer to Him, someone who could make me laugh, someone that I could just genuinely enjoy being around and spending time with, sure I was talking about a guy for a relationship. But God saw that’s not what I needed in my life right now, instead He sent me new friends and grew my current friendships. I have never been surrounded by this many friends like this that genuinely love and care for me, and only want the best for me. I have never felt this much love around me in my friendships, and maybe part of that is my fault, I don’t know.
All I do know is that if you’re in the same boat as me, just be patient. It’s hard, I know, but it’ll be so worth it when that day finally comes for us to meet our “lobster”. Right now all we can do is live in the moment, take in the little things, enjoy the now instead of dwelling on the when, and remember that there is no relationship requirement once you reach a certain age, no matter what society tells you.
As long as you wake up and do your best, that’s all that matters.
Saturday Morning 
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